Is sexist humour really funny?

The announcement of Bill and Melinda Gates’ divorce took the internet by storm. Expressions of disbelief and wonder soon turned into Whatsapp forwards and memes. The ‘humorous’ substratum of most of these forwards was the notion that men should be wary of ‘gold diggers’ as their hard-earned money might be at stake. Another joke was about how men shouldn’t earn such large sums of money, because if he does, wives would find the idea of alimony more appealing than the husband himself. The statement goes on to say that he ought to spend his money on himself.

Out of these problematic, bigoted statements, there’s only one part that can be deemed agreeable- the fact that patriarchy doesn’t allow men to spend money on themselves. Being the ‘providers’ of families, their desires are often pushed down the list of priorities and even when they do spend on themselves, it’s riddled with guilt. Men ought to spend on themselves guiltlessly.

Before coming to the other side of the statement, we must ask ourselves- Can wealth be measured ONLY in terms of pay-cheques? What about the decades of unpaid labor women are subjected to? It is immeasurable, the years of household chores and scrutinized budgeting that homemakers perform. More often than not, women sacrifice their entire careers solely to support their husbands’ dreams. When these ambitious men become successful, why shouldn’t their wives have a claim in it? Where is the question of financial security for these women and how will they fend for themselves incase their marriages don’t work out?

If this were the case for Mackenzie Scott and Melinda Gates, if they officially or unofficially worked towards the success of their husbands’ billion-dollar empires, is it even wrong for them to ask for monetary compensation?

These jokes could be overlooked if even a small part of them focused on how to financially empower women, rather than painting them as gold diggers. Unfortunately, the conversation is far from that. Majority of society is too busy smugly smiling to themselves while clicking the ‘forward’ button continually. Frequently, we smile along without raising our voices against these sexist, misogynistic quotidian happenings. As difficult as it might be, how much ever we convince ourselves to not speak up by thinking ‘it’s not worth the argument’, we must remind ourselves that it absolutely is!